It’s no surprise with what is going on with the world, that we are getting more anxious each day. As we watch the news, & look at social media filled with Covid-19 content, we fall into a rabbit hole that we end up not being productive, worrying about things that we can’t control & wasting such precious time we have, focusing toooo much on days, weeks and months ahead of us.
Ever since I’ve been diagnosed with GAD/ & postpartum anxiety 3 years ago, (anxiety, & not depression) I’ve been taught how to handle, manage & cope by the experts. Anxiety is normal. However having severe anxiety can be exhausting and can eventually disrupt/ruin your day to day living. Of course it’s a journey & a process & you have to help yourself too. For the sake of you and your family. Throughout the 3 years, I’ve learned so much & developed a routine and some practices that would one day be so useful especially with what is happening lately.
I never knew how far I’ve come and was quite surprised that I am managing well right now… The days I think that I wasn’t going anywhere throughout those years or that I’m not improving in managing such, I was, actually. Just baby steps & Eventually, you”ll get there. Really proud to say that all of the really heartbreaking & devastating hardships I’ve gone through which I have not shared to some of you, made me definitely stronger. I be-friended my anxiety (trust me, it was hard) so definitely not an easy task. I can’t just imagine for others that are just learning about theirs now, in a snap. When all are in such level of stress and fear. How hard, unknown and shocking it could be. Of course, I’m no way an expert or perfect on this & that I know everyone is different. I’m basically just sharing what works for me. Try it, maybe it will work for you too! I’ve never been happier, more alive & purposeful until now. Let’s focus on what we can control. I know easier said than done but we have to help ourselves so we can also help others. One of the reasons I’m sharing my journey hence forth.
- SET THE TONE FOR THE DAY.
It makes such a difference when you start the day by filling your cup first. I highly recommend meditating for 5-10 mins daily. I know easier said than done but it grounds you & makes you focus in the present. It calms your mind & really sets the tone for the day. Right after, I journal write to really connect and check in with myself. I vent, pray, or I reflect and then, one major thing is… I write all the things I am grateful for (& why) – big and small. THERE IS ALWAYS SOMETHING TO BE GRATEFUL FOR! I find when I miss doing this practice first thing in the morning, I am just lost the whole day. LOL.
Here is what my typical morning looks like:
- 6:30 am Wake up, wash face, brush teeth
- 6:45 am meditate (good meditation apps out there like Calm & headspace)
- 7:00 am Journal Write, read, pray
- 8:00 am Quick 30 min Workout
- 8:30- 9:30 am morning green smoothie + Read book
- 9:30am Domi wakes up & then I make his breakfast
- 10:00 am Play time/learning time for Domi
- 11am: Checking my phone for the first time, turning off Airplane mode. Check the news and weather for 10-15 mins.
- 12nn: Lunch for Domi and I
2. FILL IN WITH THE GOOD.
I’m not saying ignore bad things or ignore what is going on around you. What I’m saying is, if we fill in and focus ourselves with all the goodness, it expands. WHAT WE FOCUS ON, EXPANDS. So you have to be careful of the things you consume. Whether its food you eat or the news, who you talk to, the accounts you follow etc. Everything is a choice. Besides, you wouldn’t want to be with people who emit low vibrations, or are so negative about life and love to gossip. You end up getting affected by it & sometimes, unconsciously, pass it on to someone else!
Going back, I love listening to podcasts and watching videos in Youtube that make me happy & that provide good, useful information. I usually do this when I’m doing chores. (multi tasking for sure!) lol I also take time to read good books about 30 mins a day. Currently I’m reading “The Conscious Parent” by Shefali Tsabary, PhD. So fill yourself with the good throughout your day. One thing too that I love is Pinterest!
NEED some book recommendations? Check out my next post! Will be talking about the books I like.
3. LIMIT SOCIAL MEDIA & THE NEWS
I know it can be hard cause It can be addicting. But just like how we limit our kids with TV time, I think it should be applied to us on a daily basis as well. Don’t know how much your screen time is? If you have an iPhone, it tracks it & send you a weekly report. I limit myself to checking the news once or twice a day for a short period of time. It is good to be updated and know whats going on with the world but only once or twice a day. With regards to Social Media, I stop spending so much time & energy mindlessly scrolling. I usually just check in once, twice as well, either I put out helpful info, share a lil bit of my day or check up on people and connect to my followers.
This practice is proven to drastically decrease anxiety and depression for sure. It eliminates us comparing to others, cherry picking & soaking in negativity. You also tend to be more productive! Trust me, there’s so much more productive things you can do. As for me I either clean and purge, a quick workout, provide makeup learning tutorials, take walks outside with my son, write on the blog, self care and so much more!
4. DO THE THINGS YOU LOVE.
What makes your heart sing? Is it baking, putting makeup on, sketching, singing karaoke? You do you! For me I love sketching, colouring, makeup artistry, fashion, watching & listening to Disney stuff and spending good Quality time with my boys. Don’t get pressured in colour coded activities that we think we need for ourselves, or our kids. There are some days that IT’S OKAY TO FEEL WHAT YOU FEEL & JUST BE. If all you did was to get through & To survive the day, kudos to you.
We are already stressed or anxious and you want to put more stress??? lol I know one thing is for sure, make sure when you’re feeling overwhelmed, you think about the things you love to do. Listen to your body and see what It needs at that very moment. You need a rest day? Sure. You need a break from your kid? Give an hour to yourself to do what you want to do that makes your heart sing! For me, since I fill in my day before everyone wakes up, my cup is full. However there are some days that aren’t perfect and I end up sleeping half of the day, take 10,000 pictures of my family, I eat a bag of chips or I put a full face of makeup on even though Im staying at home. LMAO. well, it makes me happy so… I DO IT! I find that right after, I feel so much calmer, like I had just pushed my reset button.
5. AWARENESS is key. BE PRESENT .BREATHE. IN AND OUT. FOCUS WHERE YOUR FEET ARE, ON THE NOW.
Life is so short to be wasted. Time goes by so fast. We are so anxious of tomorrow that we forget to LIVE today. I always remind myself to take it day by day, hour by hour, literally having a few check ins everyday to see how Im feeling and to just focus on what is in front of me, right now, right here.
It’s a struggle sometimes and so tempting to think about tomorrow. But reality is, tomorrow doesn’t exist yet, only now. One of the hardest things on Anxiety, was this. I was overwhelmed and focused of what’s gonna happen to tomorrow that I forget to treasure on what is in front of me. I tend to think worse case scenarios and once I go overboard, I just breakdown. for
For Ex, my son coughs only once and I think he’s gonna die, My HR would go up, constantly checking on him all the time. Yes, it could me too dramatic for other people, “Over reacting mommy over here” for others, but in reality, thats just what I’m feeling and Sometimes I can control, sometimes I don’t. I then realized It has stemmed from when I almost lost him back when he was only 10 weeks old due to pneumonia. PTSD for sure. Once I figure out where its coming from, I then write it down, detach myself from that feeling, I tell myself IT IS OKAY TO FEEL LIKE THIS, that it doesnt define me, or as a mother, I accept that feeling then I figure out ways to cope. A therapist from a hospital taught us to have coping cards and read it all the time once we are feeling really anxious. Right now and I can say I improved so much compared to the past few years.
6. HAVE AN AMAZING SUPPORT SYSTEM THAT YOU CAN TRUST & COUNT ON.
My husband is AMAZING. let me tell ya. He supports and definitely loves me unconditionally. He is one of the people I trust and value the most. I’m pretty sure you have a loved one that you can count on. Whether its your family, friends, or colleagues. You will know who are those who genuinely want to help you, who are there to JUST LISTEN, (no unsolicited advice, just there to listen.) They won’t judge, talk about you to others, laugh at you, tell your secrets & that wont compare you to their situations or to others. They just… Love. understand and support. So, find your tribe, find your amigos. and If not, You always have me, as a friend, yourself that you can count on, & your Faith (Papa God, Mama Mary, the angels and saints are always listening).
7. GIVE A LIL SUNSHINE TO OTHERS.
No matter how big or small, a simple checking up on someone, helping a mama in need, donating $5, smiling at a stranger or paying it forward at a drive thru—– man, feels so damn good! One that I do often is put up daily quotes or inspirational things either from my journal, books or posts. I can’t count how many times I’ve gotten a message like ” oh, you have no idea that I needed this” to the point one actually said ” I was thinking cutting myself & needed to see that” “thank you for this” “what book is this? I should keep in with me at work” etc. So try to be kind, hard sometimes. especially if we are being attacked. Give sunshine to others— it will make not only the other person feel good but so will you. <3
Hope you are having an amazing day! We are going to make through this & don’t forget, No matter what the day brings, always find JOY. 🙂 <3
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